What is your story? Why do we all have a story? Because our story unfolds daily from the reality of the nature of relationships being how we affect others and how others affect us. Whether we react non-resourcefully or respond resourcefully in relationships is determined by the principles, core values, concepts that we learned from infancy to the present that form our thinking, attitudes and actions through which we daily consciously and unconsciously relate either resourcefully or non-resourcefully in LIFE to ourselves, others, God. We do not always respond resourcefully because we all have our non-resourceful “stuff”, unfortunately.
Years ago, my oldest daughter found herself in some challenging relationship situations with some friends of hers. One of those sad times when good friends get crossways with each other, taking sides and becoming combative, mean spirited hurting one another in ways that they would normally never do. Ever been there?
But these not normal times happen. While talking with her in looking for something to encourage her soul I said to her: When LIFE is all said and done, our story is not as much about what we accomplish in LIFE, but how we treat, relate to one another along the way, our journey.
Yes, all too often in LIFE we find ourselves in challenging relationships like this don’t we? The truth is that we do not get to choose how someone relates to us, but we do get to choose how we relate to others.
In raising our 3 children, when their behavior became non-resourceful to the extent that some form of intervention, correction, discipline-continuing education was needed, I coined a phrase. I told them that if they didn’t straighten up and fly right, (My preferred parental summary statement encouraging them to refer to the core principles, values, concepts that they had been taught for resourceful thinking, attitude, actions and behavior) then I was going to give them a” tune up.”
Most of the time all the “tune up” they needed to resolve the current relational conflict was a verbal reminder and or first-time instruction of a principle core value concept to transform their thinking, attitude, actions and behavior to bring about a more resourceful outcome.
Most of the time all the “tune up” we need to resolve the current relational conflict is a verbal reminder and or first-time instruction of a principle core value concept to transform our thinking, attitude, actions and behavior to bring about a more resourceful outcome.
Think of it this way. If you want to chop more wood in the same amount of time, then take time to keep the ax sharpened. If you want to clean more fish in the same amount of time, then take time to keep the filet knife sharpened. It takes specific sharpening tools to keep an ax and a filet knife sharp. If you want to relate to yourself, others and God more resourcefully in your LIFE time, then take time to apply the specific tools of principled core values, concepts to keep yourself “sharpened.” We all need “tune ups” from time to time including yours truly!
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